Guys guys, come quick!

Hey there, chicks and dudes, something awesome happened today:
I found a bottle that GRANTS WISHES.
Seriously.
I can prove it to! check it out
The premise
The bottle grants wishes in 3 ways:

• yes
• no
• maybe

If you get a yes, then congrats! Your wish is answered! If you get a no, then... and a maybe is kind of like a "decision pending", but you get a yes or no in the end.
Hypothesis
By asking for stuff from the mighty bottle, I can receive it!
The test
I went to the bottle, got on my knees and said
"Oh wise and mighty bottle, may you find it in your infinite wisdom to grant me a pen?"
And the very next day, guess what? I GOT A PEN!! The bottle works! I figured that wouldn't be enough for you guys though, so I tried again.
I went to the bottle, got on my knees and said
"Oh wise and mighty bottle, may you find it in your infinite wisdom to not let this bottle of milk go off?"
And the very next day, the milk went off! The bottle answered my prayer again! Only this time, it was a no :(. I still didn't think this would be enough, so I returned to the bottle once more.
I went to the bottle, got on my knees and said
"Oh wise and mighty bottle, may you find it in your infinite wisdom to grant me a messenger of your greatness?"
And the very next day, guess what? Nothing! The bottle answered my prayer again, only this time with a maybe! However, the bottle will eventually grant me with a yes or a no in some way.
Wait a second, answers prayers... messenger of greatness... OH MY BOTTLE. THIS THING MUST BE SOME SORT OF GOD. Can you see what I'm getting at?